I put up the prayer because I need it....days are agonizing for me...can I just go to sleep and never wake up? of the four weblogs I read daily, three authors are expecting and one recently had her fourth child....
I know, just stop getting online...would help some...but I know three people In Real Life that are also expecting....so everywhere I look, pregnant bellies....a constant reminder of the pain.
I don't want anything drastic to happen to DH...he is young and at a time in his life where he is already questioning his whole manhood in terms of career and such...plus he already gets anxiety attacks...he needs more calm in his life not upheavel..I try to be a constant calm aspect in his life...but again the wanting to give DS a sibling for over 5 years now is the one thing that constantly brings me down.
I understand some moms seem idylic ya know good homemakers, scheduley types who eat right and exercise everyday...but then others are totally the opposite that and yet they too are having their 2nd or higher blessing...true meaning of no respector of persons.....well if that's true why do I feel like I have to deny myself carbs, workout til I collapse, kick my hiney for not getting enough done on my to do list everyday and also be the best help meet ever to DH....ya know...like "I'm punching the aire" and for what? To hear that my "friend" in Ohio, who just had baby #6...while drinking pepsi 24/7 as her only beverage, also smoked, and told me that I should quit my job and get DS in a routine and then the Lord would bless me with another child...while she admits she doesn't even have set times for meals everyday...quit telling me what to do and quit complaining to me about your "I've have so many children I don't know what to do" and "oh being pregnant is so horrible, can we trade places"....here's a quarter call someone who cares because I would love to be in your shoes...ya know.
so again, just need others to pray over me.
thank you
2 comments:
I am praying with you Sister. You are not alone, it isnt easy for everyone to concive. I understand.
You have blessed me with your blog and I have added you to mine, please visit and let me know if it is ok!!
Bless you.
Amy in Australia
I have prayed and continue to pray.
Everytime I look down at my preggy belly, I think of you. Everytime the baby is really active, I think of you. I want so much to see you pregnant again (and my friend with no children).
I cried the day I found out I was pregnant, for my friend (back in December). I wanted her pregnant, too. I feel the same way for you, I want your pain to be diminished. I want you to be healed. I pray for you constantly. I know God hears me and I will continue to lift you up in prayer.
Yes, at times I feel overwhelmed, but that doesn't stop me from praying for you. I know that God has blessed my womb, but as a child of God I must be "fruitful and multiply" as I am able. I am only following God's command by having children. He has given me all that I have, and I pray that He will give you more, many more.
My heart breaks for you every time I read this post, and I have read it at least 3-4 times. Not knowing even what to say, at first. But I have continued to come back and read it, and I have felt the need to leave you a comment, even if my words aren't right. I am praying for you. I am praying for you!!!
Blessings & Prayers!
Heather
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